Here’s a term that makes us cringe, especially for us women.
Our skin is wrinkly, our eyelids are droopy, our boobs are saggy, our body takes longer to recover from each of our excesses… A never ending list.
When we look back or stumble on an old photo and saying “It has been 10 years already!”. Or even, when doing our shopping online and we have to enter our date of birth, we realize we have to scroll further and further down to select the year. Or nightclubs. You know, the ones filled the girls just as young as your niece! What anguish!
A few photos from the past or even a few clothing pieces in our wardrobe remind us that times have changed. Our style is completely different and so are our desires.
There is no remedy. That’s the cycle of nature and life too. No magic formulas, no magic pills to go back in time. A little bit of Botox if you desire it but even if it works wonders on the outside, it doesn’t change how we feel on the inside of our body.
As we often say to reassure ourselves, “Everything is in the head”. And it is so true!
Do you remember your 20s? As fresh as a rose, sure of herself but often fragile, indecisive, misunderstood. They are not necessarily the best years in a woman’s life. Experiences, failures, misunderstandings: we ask ourselves a lot a questions at that age.
Today at 30, 40 years old or more, we are finally WOMEN: imposed, master of our choices with enough maturity to make the right ones. We might not all know what we want but we certainly do know what we no longer want.
How exciting it is to grow old naturally, to take care of our skin by using specific products and care and to finally have found the style of a woman who is sure of herself. No more faux-pas because experience taught us that leopard is only worn is small doses. Or even that cleavage and short skirts do not go hand-in-hand. It is one or the other, never both at once.
And just between us, how many men fantasize about the more mature women?
So why panic? The word out there is that the 40s are the most fulfilling years in a woman’s life...
Translation: Melanie Harlay
Photo credit: Jana Sabeth on Unsplash
Our Planet is burning. Our Planet is bleeding. Our resources are becoming less and less and it is urgent we go back to the essentials.
Going back to the essentials touches everything in our daily lives from the way we eat, to the way we go from point A to point B, to our general consumption but it also touches the way we dress.
Mass production is becoming a huge ecological problem. Pollution, waste and High Street brands that produce up to 8 collections a year. Fashion has become the 3rd most polluting industry.
Brands now tend to produce more to make us spend more but with a lesser quality.
Evidently, I am not asking you to stop buying High Street, Premium or Luxury brands but to rather make thoughtful purchases; fashion pieces that will be with you for years and not shoved at the back of your wardrobe, therefore slowing down the pace of mass production.
The second option would be to buy from ethical brands; to buy less but to buy better with a true human ecological work behind it. Brands that are using natural materials, where workers are treated and paid fairly, where children are not used for labor and where women can be reintroduced to the work force in certain countries.
Luckily, more and more designers are now becoming engaged and responsible.
See a list below of different styles, for every tastes, shipping worldwide:
Last but not least, the third option is to buy second-hand!
Choosing second-hand can in fact be considered ethical in many ways because we are recycling! In London, you can find as many charity shops as there are bakeries in France!
In other places, you will find boutiques called “Second-Hand” or “Vintage Shop” that are a little more expensive but completely worth it.
Back in the day, what we used to produce was a much better quality therefore allowing us to find pieces a fraction of the price that lasted us for years.
My message is to simply make baby steps towards a more human and ethical environment, going back to basics and taking care of what we have.
More love x
Translation: Melanie Harlay
Photo credit: Stock photography on Unsplash
I hesitated a long time before writing this article. Should I do it? Do I even have the right to do it? Hell yeah!
It has been a few years now that we are talking about “Positive Body”, supposed to help women, often with curves, to love their body. This is something I highly support.
Although, today I would like to talk about another “Positive Body”. The one that we never talk about. The one that concerns thin and skinny women, who too, do not feel at ease with their own body. The one where they think of themselves as childish looking, with no shape and no feminity, or even “sick” looking. A body that burns even more calories or loses even more weight at every moment of stress and fatigue.
I can talk about this subject very passionately because I WAS on of those women before sending my insecurities to hell. It USED to be one of my dreams to have a voluptuous body with a beautiful derrière and feminine shapes.
A voluptuous woman is the ideal. It represents ancestry, motherhood, security and stability. Greek statues show off a voluptuous body and during Renaissance times, they really well represented with a few extra pounds through paintings. The most iconic woman of the 50s: Marilyn Monroe, with her irregular and womanly shapes, completely outcasted all of the other talented actresses of her time, who were all a lot thinner than her. She was men’s ultimate fantasy. Women admired her but were also jealous of her.
All those insecurities about being flat-chested, skinny legs and a bum that doesn’t fill up your jeans, swimwear often too big; all of it is often created through men’s eyes who, for the majority, want a woman with “something to touch and grab, a voluptuous body that is sexually attractive.
“Doesn’t it bother you to not have any boobs?”
“Do you eat enough?”
“Why don’t you try to have more shapes like this woman on the TV?”
Simply because this is how my metabolism works. Thanks for asking!
And because it is skinny girls who appear on magazines and TV that I am supposed to feel better about myself? We should be happy no matter what and consider ourselves lucky that we don’t have weight to lose?
The acceptance, self-confidence and love of one’s self is a long and complicated process. A strenuous mind work that will eventually prove itself effective in the long run. We need to pamper our body and learn to live with it, like a lifetime companion.
What about if we didn’t care about free and hurtful comments?
What about if we chose to treat our mind and body to everything that they need and desire rather than trying to please a jury?
What about if we tried to showcase our attributes? Even if it is small.
What about if we focused on having a healthy mind, body and lifestyle?
As simple as that…
Translation: Melanie Harlay
Credit photo: Kira Ikonniko via Unsplash
A woman is strong and powerful.
But to be so in her social, love and work life, a woman needs to feel good in her body and have faith in her radiance. She needs to learn how to get rid of her complexes from childhood or teenage years, or at least learn how to subdue them.
In order to control those complexes that sometimes can cripple you in your everyday life like having difficulties making decisions, speaking in public or even the confiding in someone, there is of course those "personal development" books you can find on Amazon, which can help in short-term cases. But how long will it last? To tell you that life is beautiful and that you need to stay positive won’t make you progress.
Luckily for you ladies, there is Image Consulting. This is where we, coaches, come into play to teach you how to reconcile yourself with your figure and what you see in the mirror.
Looking at themselves in the mirror, many of my clients told me they have never seen their body looking this way after a session. After so many years, they used to wear clothes that didn’t suit their body shape because they lacked information and direction or simply because they wanted to follow the fashion trend.
And then there are others who decided to give up, lost in magazines, drowned by the overproduction of popular fashion brands and discouraged by the demands of our society.
Feeling good with your own style, wearing clothes that flatters your harmonious body shapes and wearing colours that brighten you up is the first step towards a chosen positive attitude.
There is a limited number of body shapes but every woman is unique therefore needing a coaching tailored to her needs but also her desires, which is important to respect.
A successful "personal shopping" session or a "wardrobe edit" will give you the tools to keep going by yourself and keep improving in your personal development.
You have nothing to lose by making the first step towards long lasting positive change so book your first “image consulting” session and rediscover your body.
Translation: Melanie Harlay